After A Tragic Loss

Good morning…

“I love the last paragraph of today’s post,” she wrote after reading yesterday’s morning message Shocked Grievers Have No Words.

Given each breath, we inch our way into moment by moment. Hour by hour. Day by day. Week by week. Month by month. Season by season. Year by year.

“That is exactly how we proceed after a tragic loss without even realizing it,” she continued. “At first, in a blur not even realizing time is moving forward and, second, feeling guilty for a moment when we first realize we are moving forward without them. And then finally, in fond memory when things remind us of them and we smile with a tear, our broken heart patched back together over time.”

In a second email she elaborated further and gave me permission to share: “When I read the last paragraph, it made me think of our friends’ tragic loss and my heart aches that they will have to go through those painful steps once the whirlwind of time comes back to ‘somewhat normal.’ I remember thinking back to the first several days after my brother died suddenly when I was growing up. I didn’t even know what day or time or what the date actually was. I still don’t know the for sure date and I really don’t care to. I do not want a final day and time I mourn every year. Is that strange? He is in my heart everyday so I do not want to think about the one tragic day I lost him. I like to remember him all the time.”

This morning, I also remember a dear friend whose husband died three years ago today. Earlier in the week, she texted: “The three year mark. Something about it feels hopeful and life-giving right now. Can’t wait to watch the sunset on the new Beltline trail. We used to walk the east side trail together as it was just being established.”

The trail through grief is a well-worn path, a painful path all will sometime walk, a healing path established from east to west by the hand of our living Lord.