Good morning…
Well, I guess I am not the only person prone to “dragging one’s feet.” Receiving many responses to yesterday’s post, I Am Dragging My Feet, I saw your tender words of wisdom settling into three categories.
Some of you looked back, reminiscing, remembering.
“Sue, I just wanted to say how fortunate I felt to be included in your Sr. Mom studies. It was such a special time and a difficult one, simultaneously. Thank you for inviting me in and sharing your wisdom and love❤️.”
“Oh Sue – such bittersweet days, I understand, I remember. It speaks to how well we have loved being mothers, and not just to our own children but to all their sweet friends too.”
“You are exactly where I was last year! We will stay tuned to see what God has planned for us. Enjoy this year to the fullest!”
“I have been following your blog for years, you are such an incredible inspiration. Your message today brought back so many memories. When my son was leaving Morris Brandon Elementary School 25 years ago, we had a wonderful group of 10 Moms that didn’t want to lose touch with kids going off to different middle schools. That summer we had a once a week get-together for ‘coffee in the park’ with our kids, and then when they went to school the next year we started ‘Friday afternoon wine,’ a tradition we continued through their college years. Though some of us have moved away, we still get together several times a year for birthday dinners, the same 10 Moms, so lasting friendship doesn’t have to end!!! Thank you for sharing your wonderful gift of faith and hope❤️.”
Some of you focused on right now, expressing, encouraging.
“I so admire your willingness to experience your emotions and share them with us. In revealing your innermost feelings, you comfort and validate us as we experience very similar emotions. Sometimes we are aware of them. Other times, we mask them, even to ourselves.”
“Hi Sue, I can so empathize with you. You may be dragging your feet, but I am in denial… And you wouldn’t believe the laissez-faire attitude I’ve had toward scheduling things to help our last child apply to college… I guess it seems like it might not happen if I just ignore it… Many thanks for holding the senior moms’ study one more time ?. I will need it! Please put me on the roster.”
“Sue, as you supported me thru my boys’ senior year, I and the rest of your vast community will support you thru your last baby’s senior year. Don’t fret. Be strong and enjoy the the very fast ride of this special school year. Stop to smell the scent of smelly boy laundry and smelly gyms while you patiently watch his wrestling tournaments and the fresh cut grass at lacrosse games. Smile during those homecoming and prom picture parties knowing he will always be your little boy. Laugh during those all too infrequent ‘family of three’ dinners, and then when he gets up and leaves the table, sit back with a glass of wine and look at your husband and say, ‘We’ve done ok by him.’ No need to fret over what you could have done better or different or about all the things he still may not know how to do for himself (mine still don’t know how to do laundry ?). He will figure it out. Hang in there! You’ve got this and we’ve got you!”
“Oh, Sue. The first of many transitional moments this year. This letting go is hard, but just think you’ve got a year ahead of Wednesday’s when you can ‘memorize’—be intentional—about soaking it all up and reflecting on the years behind. Who knows what lies ahead? But as God is my witness, look what happens when you give the reigns over. This ‘becoming’ is palpable.”
“Dear Sue …I can totally relate to what you are going thru …it’s a grieving process …although mine is different …in a few short days my father will celebrate his 100th birthday and I couldn’t understand why it was so hard for me to send out the invitations for an open house and special dinner to honor our patriarch …I’m also learning about enneagram (I’m a 7) not wanting to sit in my pain …yet when I prayed and sat there …the reason was it probably may be the last time we get to celebrate and I have been doing lots of anticipatory grieving …called the long goodbye …It was the words of my father that put it into perspective …it’s a once in life time event and T.I.M.E. (things I must experience) is all we have left …so I pushed the sent button and now we are anticipating a pre-memory party for my dad …so he can experience this momentous occasion …Along with the rest of us. Have a blessed day.”
Some of you looked ahead, hopeful, helpful.
“Sue, it is so hard to let them go! But the next chapter is incredibly wonderful as you watch all your hard work and prayers come to fruition as our kids mature into their own adulthood and grow up their own families. I will pray for you, my friend. Hang on for the ride of your life❤️. I love you.”
“I won’t lie and say it’s easy, but it’s the circle of life??.”
“Hi Sue, I read your message today. While I understand where you are coming from, selfishly I was hoping you would continue teaching the Sr. Moms Study. As you know, our daughter is a junior this year. I thoroughly enjoyed this study and chance to get to know the other mothers with our older kids’ class. I was looking forward to the chance to do that again. I guess someone else could step in and lead one, but you were the glue that held us all together. You are so good at leading discussions and getting us to speak what is in our hearts. Not many people have that gift. Regardless, thank you for sharing your gifts with people. Not just the senior moms group but all of your studies and gatherings. I have learned and grown because of them. What would you think about conducting a new group on reinventing ourselves in this new chapter of our lives without children at home? You could guide us through exploring our gifts and passions as we redefine our meaning in life. Just a thought. Thank you for everything.”
“Six years ago, I remember well how excited I was to be doing the Senior Mom Study with you…and it was the beginning of the single most significant transformation of my life. We read the book Boundaries and it opened my eyes to begin to see life (my life) in a healthier way. It was the birth of my own unraveling. It was also, most likely the beginning of the end of a marriage. I didn’t know it at the time, but I do now. Since then, we have journeyed together through the pages of some remarkable and life giving books. Gifts From the Sea, Gifts of Imperfection, The Hidden Life, When the Heart Waits are some of the most meaningful. THANK YOU. For all that you have given me (and my girls) and all of us moms over the years. The time was an unimaginable gift – a selfless and glorious gift. Now go on – write that invitation and savor your last year with these moms! Love you! XOXO.”
Tears filled my eyes as I felt this final email nudging my dragging feet over my brink. At 3:00 pm, I pushed “send” on the invitational email I had spent much of the day prayerfully preparing. Within the first twelve hours, the first fifteen women responded, excited to join this year’s study. So we as a new group are up and off, savoring our last year with our high school seniors, unique children of God who will soon be up and off.
Nearing the end of a very expressive day, one of you uncovered our Scripture verse. “Today’s post? I loved it. Sure wish I had had a senior mom’s study when our kids were getting ready to leave the nest…..Here is the verse that came to me when I read your post……Isaiah 43:19 (NIV).”
See, I am doing a new thing!
Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.
…Sue…
