Good morning…
Adrift. She shares her truth. In so many important ways, my soul friend feels adrift.
She has moved away from what has long been her church home. She has lost trust in a minister with whom she shares a deep, rich history. She feels kicked out of her extended family, a pain intensifying as the holidays near. Recently vacationing with an old friend group, she simply could not fake the fact that she no longer fits in.
“Adrift feels very lonely,” she says honestly through her tears.
“I recently listened to a podcast about the stages of faith development,” she goes on to say.
1: Black/white thinking, rigid boxes to check.
2. Complexity.
3. Perplexity.
4. Harmony.
“When we are entering a new phase, we will be really drawn to it,” she shares her learning. “I am not in harmony, but harmony feels really, really appealing to me right now.”
As I listen to her by phone, my attention is drawn to the antique picture hanging behind my spiritual direction chair. Adrift. The image captures for me the unsettling feeling of being adrift.
“There’s no motor on this boat,” I describe to her the image. “No oars. No hands on form of control. There is just a quiet drifting into the dark alcove in an island chiseled out of rock. An undifferentiated mass of trees are in the center, jaggedly reaching up to touch a cloudy sky. A sense of silent helplessness permeates everything. How do we navigate the unknown?”
“A figure in a white robe stands firm, faces forward, bows his head,” I continue. “Jesus is with us in this boat, preparing our way. He has been here before, drifting toward a death to self. Adrift with Jesus, we are slowly drawn into the mystery of death and resurrection.”
“When I survey this island image, I see peace. I sense the harmony you hope for,” I say before sending my friend the photo. “Adrift feels very lonely, and adrift with Jesus is our only real hope for lasting peace.”
Don’t worry over anything whatever; tell God every detail of your needs in earnest and thankful prayer, and the peace of God which transcends human understanding, will keep constant guard over your hearts and minds as they rest in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:6-7, PHILLIPS).
“To guide us toward the love we most desire, we must be taken where we could not and would not go on our own,” says a quote from Gerald May. “And lest we sabotage the journey, we must not know where we are going. Deep in the darkness, way beneath our senses, God is instilling ‘another, better love,’ and ‘deeper, more urgent longings’ that empower our willingness for all the necessary relinquishments along the way.”
Next Jesus was taken into the wild by the Spirit for the Test. The Devil was ready to give it. Jesus prepared for the Test by fasting forty days and forty nights. That left him, of course, in a state of extreme hunger… (Matthew 4:1-2a, MSG).
Fasting from old sources of comfort, adrift with Jesus alone, might my friend’s extreme hunger for harmony instill another better love and deeper, more urgent longings?
…Sue…
