Good morning…
“We cannot come to the altar in conflict,” said yesterday’s Betty Skinner quote.
“But, God, hadn’t we just written the opposite?” I thought to myself. Our post, Quiet The Voice Of Despair, had just revealed our honest truth: The voice of despair and the voice of “I love you” play tug-o-war in us sometimes. This common inner battle feels like conflict to me.
So, God, does this mean I am not welcome at your altar until I figure myself out?
In my confusion, a Bible verse rises from within. “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life” (John 6:68, NIV). I prayerfully dialogue with my spiritual mentor in heaven, “Betty, what do you mean I can’t come to God’s altar in conflict? Right now, I really don’t know how to come any other way.”
Quietly I am drawn to the page number given for Betty’s quote, so I open my tattered book to page 159.
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Excerpt from The Hidden Life Awakened by Kitty Crenshaw and Dr. Cathy Snapp
God honors our choices, particularly those that are in the direction of reconciliation, healing and love. God will not force us to choose to forgive, but if we do not, He will not be able to set us free from the broken relationships that keep us bound up in fear, anger, and shame. We cannot come to the altar in conflict. Reconciliation requires that we release people from our anger and resentment. If we aren’t moving in the direction of being reconciled to others, how can we be reconciled to God? We choose our own binding. If we don’t also choose to break free from them, we will never be free. When we truly believe that God has forgiven us, we are able to forgive another.
…Jesus places no limits on His forgiving love. He takes the mud and the silt of common humanity and transforms it by grace; resting all on the foundation stone of forgiveness. Might we open our hearts even wider to receive Christ’s love in rebuilding our own lives on the foundation stone of forgiveness?
In His love that holds the whole of humanity in a compassionate embrace,
Betty
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An “ah-ha” moment occurs for me.
I can choose to remain closed, locked in my own binding, spiraling down into the voice of despair. If I choose to remain bound up in my fear, my anger, my shame, I keep myself away from the altar of our God. Might I inch in the direction of reconciliation and rebuilding? Jesus puts no limits on his forgiving love, but I need to surrender the mud and the silt of my life if I am to be transformed by the grace of our God.
Do I truly believe God has forgiven all that binds me? Fear. Anger. Shame. Resentment. I choose to relinquish all to the One who repeats, “I love you. I love you. I love you.” As I surrender myself at the altar in the little chapel of my heart, I am graciously filled with God’s forgiving love for me and for the whole of our muddied humanity.
…Sue…
P.S. Dear friend and co-author of The Hidden Life Awakened, Dr. Cathy Snapp, will elaborate on Betty’s wisdom at Peachtree Road United Methodist Church on Sunday, the 16th at 10:00 am. Please consider joining us at God’s welcoming altar.
