My recent post, “Run toward the roar,” has created a lot of great dialogue, face to face and through email exchanges.
One long time friend, who has lived through an immensely painful loss, wrote: “Hey Sue. Wow, this one is powerful and hits me deeply. As I think about it I don’t see myself having run towards the roar when bad things have happened in my life. It feels more like after our huge tragedy, I just stood close enough to hear the roar and didn’t run away, slowly accepting it. I think I slowly but surely excepted the roar to subside, even when it got closer and knocked me down, until I eventually made peace with the pain. Not as heroic as the way this man handled his wife’s death
but I think sometimes taking it slowly is all we can handle and not a bad way to process grief. Thanks so much for sharing this article. I think it is so enlightening for those that are dealing with grief, illness, or deep pain. Your words and the words of others that you share are so comforting and help to bring peace.”
My wise friend makes a very important point. I think of the word spectrum; there is a spectrum of responses to grief, to illness, or to deep pain. There is more than one way to grope through our pain to God’s peace. Sometimes we pendulum toward the pain, giving ourselves permission to feel it fully; other times we pendulum away from the pain for a while to see how that works for us. Standing still in the presence of pain, slowly accepting it, believing that the anguish will eventually dissipate is also a very nurturing option. “What will be restorative to me right now, LORD?” becomes the prayer we live out, day after day. Each moment, God meets us exactly where we are on the spectrum, moving with us through our pain until we find ourselves peacefully at rest in His ever presence.
Have compassion on me, Lord, for I am weak. Heal me, Lord, for my bones are in agony (Psalm 6:2, NLT).
