Good morning…
Her son would have celebrated his seventeenth birthday this week, if he had not gone to heaven last month. With her permission, I am posting a string of personal emails I have shared with a very special, grieving mom, a mom I had not known before this tragedy.
Thursday, 4.28.19, would have been his birthday and that morning I sent her my post, “The extraordinary gift of ordinary days.” Along with my post I sent her the following email.
“Good morning…I am praying for you with extra gusto today, knowing grief’s roar is a bit louder. I have a friend in this community who lost one teenage son to an ATV accident and several years later lost her other twenty-something son to a freak golfing accident. Their mom once described to me the way she gets through her sons’ birthdays. She says she envisions them celebrating their “first birthday in heaven,” the next year their “second birthday in heaven,” and so on. It helps her to experience her sons living on, celebrating with Jesus and all her loved ones who have gone before. She envisions a lively group of friends and family members doting over her sons until she gets to heaven to celebrate with them again, face to face, into eternity. The video in today’s message (https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=olSyCLJU3O0) will certainly bring tears to your eyes, tears of remembering and tears of missing, tears of joy and tears of sorrow. You raising two boys, just like this author, will hit very close to home. Open it and experience it if you feel led today. Or wait for another day when it will feel like a great gift. Love to you and ‘Happy First Birthday in Heaven to your sweet son.’ P.S. My schedule if open today from 4:00 to 6:00 pm if you would like me to stop by for a visit.”
She replied a few hours later: “Good morning. I really like that image of birthdays in heaven. I wonder if he is looking down on us and thinking, ‘If only they would stop crying and stop grieving. I am okay, more than okay — I am at peace and I am watching over you next to God.’ My seventh grade son told me this morning as I was dropping him off at school at 6:30 am to leave for an orchestra trip to Nashville that his brother’s first birthday in heaven will include playing golf with angels, and having a steak dinner while watching the NFL draft, without having to worry about AP exams next week. I am going to try to hold those images in my heart today and honor my son’s true essence — his gift of love and open heartedness and not let the sadness of only 17 years with him consume me. I think that is what he would want and what God wants from me. P.S. I would love it for you to be with me today during your free period. Would 5 here be okay? Thank you for the generous gift.”
Our visit that evening was a true blessing. Once again, can you not tell why I love being with people who are feeling true joy and true sorrow in such deep measure?
I will turn their mourning into gladness; I will give them comfort and joy instead of sorrow, Jeremiah 31:13b (NIV),
Sue
