The Spirit Exploded

I was living the life of my dream with our family of six in the quaint college town of New Wilmington, Pennsylvania. The postcard perfect life I had always envisioned fit neatly into the left bottom corner of my first card. That is…until…God called my husband (and thus our family) back down south to Vinings, Georgia, a place where I knew absolutely no one. God’s will trumped mine, so, in my card, I set up an altar of stones around the unformed space of the unknown.

I missed my old friends and hated leaving behind our extended family. Lonely and lost, I sunk into a deep depression. After about two years of suffering inside, I met a book that changed my life. The Hidden Life by Kitty Crenshaw and Dr. Cathy Snapp chronicled the life of Betty Skinner, who ended up in the psychiatric ward for clinical depression when she was in her early forties. I was in my early forties. She had four kids. I had four kids. She was dyslexic. I was dyslexic. She was married to an influential man. I was married to an influential man. Mired in depression, she needed to hear the still, small voice of God personally. I also needed to hear God with my own heart and mind. As the Spirit of God reached and guided Betty up from the valley of depression to the mountaintop of healed wholeness, I felt God reaching me, guiding me up from the valley of my own depression.

My bond grew strong with Betty through the pages of the book, so strong that I felt drawn to meet her in person. So I took a pilgrimage to see Betty in Ponte Vedra Beach, Florida, to sit in her vibrant presence and soak in her God-given wisdom. After that, every year, I journeyed to see her from when she was ninety years old until she went to heaven at age ninety-five. Through those five fertile years, Betty ministered to my soul. Our life-giving friendship was depicted in my second card, as Betty took my hand and walked me up from the lonesome valley to the glorious heights of daily oneness with God.

My third card represented the call I received from Spirit. Still struggling with depression, feeling hollow and heavy, God woke me from sleep one night with a crazy idea: “Host a Bible study in your home. And write the study with Me, week by week.” I had no friends, so I knew no one to invite to this Bible study. And I had journaled for years, but I had never written anything for other people to read. In pure obedient to the voice of God, I handmade invitations to a Bible study I was hosting in our home, and I handed them out at our new church to anyone who smiled at me that Sunday. To my utter surprise, seven people came to our home on that first Tuesday morning, and women have been coming to Bible studies in our home ever since. Here we are, a full twenty years later. Awakened by the Spirit, I also write daily messages for other people to read, as I blog with God in the middle of most every night.

The semester after I hosted my first Bible study in our home, I was hired at Northside Church in the Children’s Ministry (I co-wrote a year long Sunday school curriculum entitled Grow Juicy Fruit.) I loved hosting Bible study with young moms at church, so when the Women’s Ministry position opened up, I applied, was hired, and stepped into that role. Supported by the church, I continued to host Bible studies in our home and began to write blog posts in the middle of the night from the comfort of our living room. The fourth card depicted the blessing of our church in the background as I learned to center myself down with God, at home, day and night. Caring deeply for women one-on-one and in small groups. Praying privately and earnestly. Walking and talking with people going through hard things. Being drawn by the Holy Spirit to minister to the various needs in our community. God organically grew through me a deeply connected, meaningful life.

The final Soul Collage card I made last weekend highlighted the one key lesson I learned from my lifelong journey with God. The most important priority for me daily was to keep my hand in the hand of the One who fully loves me and gently leads me into eternity. Interestingly, this final card did not come home with me from the Epworth-by-the-Sea retreat center. A dear friend I had met through Betty asked me to join her in prayer this critical week, as her husband faced a complex surgery for his cancer.

She said, “Sue, please pray that I just keep my hand in God’s hand as I go through it all.”

I said, “Wait a minute.” And I went over and got my final framed image. I gave it to her with my promise to pray. In the picture above, you can see her hand on the right and my hand on the left, with God’s hand holding each of us, like the hand of a child.

After sharing my life story depicting in these five framed creations, the women gathered at round tables and dove into their pre-prepared folders of images. Talking took off. Scissors got busy. People shared powerful images with one another. Women told their stories. Laughing erupted. The “green emotion energy” (contentment, gratitude, peace, joy, love) filled the room and multiplied effortlessly. For nearly three hours, women lost themselves in the joy of creating, letting their souls speak their own personal truth.

Last Saturday night, the Spirit exploded.

Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast (Psalm 139:7-10, NIV).

…Sue…