How Did Last Night Go?

Good morning…

As I washed my face, finally home after speaking at last night’s Holiday Gathering, I looked at my hand and saw my talk in a nutshell. “Shoulds. Read story. 2 shells. Another story. Picture – perfect looking, broken. Dark night. 3 things. Journaling. Northside groups. PAWkids.” Then on the tips of my fingers. “Elf. Water. Quote. Bathe shells.” Those of you who wanted a recap, there it is, as close as the palm of your own hand.

I realize that I am not a lecturer. I am a collaborative, back and forth learner. I move from experience to experience rather than word for word. My prayer is that God did something dazzling through my imperfect offering.

What will stay with me from last night? God’s love expressed through people. With a room full of about one hundred women, I knew about twelve, some of those minimally. But I was touched by a few loving old friends arriving to surprise me. A few encouraging women from our current classes came. A woman new to the area whom I have met only twice pushed through recovery from double foot surgery to be there last night. My dear neighbor went to the wrong place because I had forgotten to tell her the address. She fought through two rounds of traffic to be there to support me. The connecting comments of the evening’s hostess. The gorgeous talent of the song leader. The friend who introduced me called me up beside her. We deeply hugged as she shared an opening prayer.

After the talk, which surprisingly ended on time, several gracious people shared words of encouragement. One woman was clearly moved. She took home several of my books for family Christmas presents and got my number so we can schedule a walk and talk soon. One long time friend kindly stayed through the very last load to help me pack up my car. A handful of people made donations to me for PAWkids for our after-school ministry, as they gathered a few items at our “It’s all free!” shop. Books I have written. Wordless prayer cards I have created. Jewelry fashioned from broken shells during our weekly arts and crafts time with the KIPP elementary and middle school students. Adorning the table were several smiling pictures that these inner city kids took of each other when we set up a make-shift photo studio. Seeing their familiar faces made my evening feel grounded and generous.

“How did last night go?” read a text from a friend, a text that came in from Florida at 3:48 am.

This blog post is my heartfelt response. The talk itself is a blur, a mysterious gift from God to us all. What lingers with me still now are the memories of the new people I met and the tangible love shared by sweet people I love.

“There is beautiful growth from brokenness.” I know I repeated this sentence several times last night. This honest refrain remains with me as I wake up into this brand new day.

God, my God, I know this to be true. Going through the motions doesn’t please you, a flawless performance is nothing to you. I learned God-worship when my pride was shattered. Heart-shattered lives ready for love don’t for a moment escape God’s notice (Psalm 51:16-17, MSG).

May our heart-shattered lives be ready for love as we head into the flawed holiday season ahead.

…Sue…